It's no secret I enjoy running. I choose to get up 5 to 6 times a week and go on my morning jog. I started getting more serious about it after Kamber passed away. I guess in many ways it helped me deal with my grief. I could be alone with my thoughts and cry if I wanted to without anyone asking me what was wrong or feel sorry for me. I love being outside around nature, it brings peace and happiness to my soul. I notice the little things around me and truly see how beautiful our earth is. I feel Heavenly Father's love for me and have had lots of spiritual experiences being outside enjoying God's creations. These days I am running on a time crunch. I hop out of bed to hurry and get dressed, run downstairs to wake my older girls up for school and then run out the door to make it back before they get on the bus. I like to get as many miles in as I can in my minimal amount of time, but seeing my girls off to school with a hug and an I Love You is very important to me. There are times that I cut it close, but they get to see me even if it is a sweaty hug.:/ Today I was running short on time but thought I would be back in time taking a different route. As I was coming down the street at the end of my run I saw Tayler's bus pull in the neighborhood. As tired as I was I geared up enough energy to sprint knowing in my heart that my legs probably weren't going to take me as fast as I needed them to, to make it to Tayler in time. So in turn I hoped that I could at least make it to the end of the street to be able to yell out to her and she could see me tell her bye! As I came to the end of the street I realized that the bus was already pulling away and my heart sank. I know it might sound a little silly, but I know all to well that at any given moment that our lives can change in an instant. I don't want my kids to ever question how I feel about them. I do know in my heart that Tayler knows I love her, but my routine was broken today. I have also been thinking about Kamber and talking about her with my girls. Our earth life we are here learning and growing, it feels like running a race a times. I don't want my time to come and I get to see Kamber to learn I have fallen short. I don't want to wait longer to be with her. When I pass on I hope that I have learn what I needed to here on earth enough that I get to be with her and I won't have to watch her from a distance. I believe that we continue to learn and grow when we leave this life. We will never reach perfection here in this earth life, but I know we can do our best here to be in a better place on the other side. Thank goodness it is half day today and I don't have to wait all day for Tayler to come home. I can tell her in a couple hours how fast I ran to see her before she left and that I love her. I did however make it to see Kylie just as her bus was pulling up!
