All In Two Years Time

On July 25 th it was 2 years since Kamber passed away. I can't believe it has been that long since I held her in my arms. Certain things about her are starting to fade now and it makes me sad, but I think that is how our bodies are able to go on after the loss of a loved one. On the other hand certain memories still linger and are played out right before us since Brookie is so much like her big sister. There are times that I glance at Brookie and swear that Kamber is standing there. I feel it is a special gift to have reminders of her through Brookie and hope that we will get glimpses of what Kamber would have been like growing up by watching Brookie grow.

A lot has changed in 2 years time. I think there has been a lot of growth in our lives. I have a new sense of peace in my life. I guess maybe that comes from starting to accept that Kamber is really gone. Two years ago if you would have told me that I would be having another baby only days before Kambers death date, I would have thought you were crazy. The thought of having another child didn't appeal to me one bit. I never thought that I would be able to be happy again in my life. I really didn't know how I would go on and wondered if I really would. I have proved myself wrong. I have made it two years and I have found happiness and another child.

So two years ago today this is what we endured. We buried one of our own. Our hearts were torn to shreds. We were exhausted with everything life had to offer. If I could have I would have gone with Kamber. It couldn't be my baby that died. Denial, Pain, Exhausted.

Two years later this is were we are at. We welcomed our little boy on July 23rd. He was

9lbs 9 oz and 21 3/4 in. We were right he was a big baby and the doctor said had we waited he would have been 11lbs. SCARY!!!

Maxton is a special blessing form above. We all adore him and can't get enough of him. He is sooo sweet and a good baby so far. Another blessing, so I am dealing really well. Brookie has been great with her little brother and loves him to death. Tayler and Kylie are very proud big sisters and think having a baby brother is AWESOME!

So at a time that sadness surrounds us, peace and happiness has enveloped us. On these days we remember our sweet daughters life and are grateful for the special time with her and eager to be with her again. BUT, we now forever will have sun shining through the clouds that brighten our day and make us grateful for both of their lives. The timing couldn't be better and once again we see Heavenly Father's hand in our lives.

Happy Birthday Gunnar who was born 2 yrs. ago today.